Do Like Dr. Doolittle -- You Must Talk to the Animals

Dear Jack, 
My beloved Barney crossed the Rainbow Bridge a few nights ago. My sister says that I should "tell" my other two cats, but this seems a little weird to me. My sister's always been a little "out there" so I thought I would ask you what I should do.
Thank you Jack.
Belinda

Dear Belinda,
ABSOLUTELY you must tell them. You must share everything that is going on. They live with you, they lived with Barney, they loved him too. They know what life is all about and they remember Where They Came From and Where They Are Going.  Humans may forget this, but this is no surprise to them.  Do not withhold information from them that will help them grow too. 

Have you learned from reading my book how alert and aware the four-leggeds are? Sometimes they are more alert than humans are. Sometimes they even care more than humans do. They want to know. They need to know. They sense clearly that something is going on and they will be very confused if you don't tell them what it is. They feel your emotions and your vibrational energy and they can become quite distressed if you do not help them to understand what's going on.  

Once you do tell them, they will need your care, comfort and compassion, so treat them gently and with understanding because they are grieving too. Their lives move much more quickly than yours do in the scheme of things, so you can go into it knowing that they will probably work through their grief rather quickly. Typically they will be resolving their grief by the time you get into the thick of yours. Then they will be there to help you with yours... because they understand.

This was a great question.  Thank you for asking it so I can share with others because some of them probably have the same question too.  

Love,
Jack

Am I Too Old for Another Dog? What if it Outlives Me?

Dear Jack, 
I wonder if you can address this issue sometime...I am 64 and don't want to risk getting another dog in case it would outlive me, plus am definitely not ready anyway. Thanks. Any feedback/ thoughts appreciated. 

Melissa

Dear Melissa,  

Please don't let your age hold you back from loving and adopting again. You are still very young in the scheme of things -- for all you know, you could live to 100 and have time for three more dogs! Why deny yourself the love you would experience just because of your fears? 

Here are my recommendations:

(1) Have your plan in place (we all should, no matter what age we are) to have someone ready to care for the one you leave behind if you have to leave first. 

(2) Pick an appropriate breed with a reasonable activity level to match yours.  Get an older dog if it seems a good match.  

(3)  Of course don't get another pet until you feel ready. 

We have an 80 year old friend who recently adopted a 2 year old miniature poodle. They have quickly become best friends and they need each other so much! "Buddy" keeps her young! After losing her previous dog of 11 years, she glows again with life and love. And Buddy? He is beyond happy, after coming from a home that gave him up because they didn't know how to love him. 

Our elderly friend Geri was recovering from the loss of her little dog Domino. She read my book and decided not to wait too long to give a new dog a good life. This is Buddy from VJ Ranch rescue. He is her new dream come true.

Life is simply too short --and sometimes too long-- not to take another chance on love. If you give a pet ONE DAY OF LOVE that it never otherwise would have known, it would be worth it. 

Love, 

Jack 

"Jack" is a Book That Shows That Love Never Dies

Dear Jack: I Didn't Get To Say Goodbye

Dear Jack, 
I still miss my beautiful, loving little girl who I lost a year ago. I came home from work one day and she had passed away in the new dog bed that I just bought for her. That was one of the worst days of my life, she was 14 and a half and had not been sick, but she must have been suffering from something. I horribly regret that I wasn't with her when her time came; that breaks my heart to this day. I feel she's with me all of the time, she is all over my apartment, her pictures, her favorite spots, her bed. This loss has been one of the hardest things I've ever had to accept. I just wish I could see her sweet little face and hold her precious body once again. I feel so terrible that I didn't get to say goodbye. 
Please advise. 
Love, 
Amanda 

Dearest Amanda, 

I would like you to understand that your beloved girl passed in your absence because she did not want you to see her in her final moments. If it had been meant to be another way, it would have unfolded another way. It happened just the way it was supposed to happen. 

We have a friend named Patty who had a beloved cocker spaniel. It was quite old and it was declining rapidly. Patty took the whole week off from her work to be with her Buddy. She rarely left his side the whole week. Then, at about 10:30 one night, she stepped away from him just long enough to go the bathroom. When she came back, she found him. He had passed in the few moments when she had left his side. I believe he was waiting for her to leave so he could leave the way he wanted to. We get very sensitive to our best friends and we know that we don't want those last moments imprinted in your mind. We don't want you to see us until the peace has come to our face... and that peace comes very quickly. 

So often human beings try to maneuver and manipulate everything to control an outcome, but eventually most of them learn that no matter how focused and determined they are, they cannot control much of anything at all. They are not supposed to control things because God is in control. Sometimes God steps into situations like this to prove it to the human.... but the human can be a slow learner and most of them keep trying to control stuff anyway because they think they can.

Kate has worked Hospice long enough to know that people do the same thing. There they are, in their final earthly hours, and their family surrounds them in a 24 hour vigil. The moment the family member leaves the room, the person has the space to breathe their last breath in private peace. Not all of them -- but many do this. 

So rest assured, your girl did things on her own terms to the last second. Please don't worry for another moment! Don't you see she did not want to say goodbye. Why would she? She knows it's not goodbye! 

She is also very grateful that you can see her, feel her, sense her there. Everyone is capable of seeing us, but not everyone is able to do it. Please know that All is Well.

Love,
Jack

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You are Never Too Small to Make A Difference in a Life

“Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.
       One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.
       As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.
       He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"
       The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."
       "I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.
       To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."
       Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"
       At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, 
       "It made a difference for that one.” 

What we do for our pets and for the animals that we rescue is much like this story about the starfish by Loren Eiseley. 

The other quote that comes to mind is this one: 

You are not too small at all!  You are larger than life for a pet (or a person) who needs you in theirs.  Remember, to a pet you are their entire world.  You are large, you are great, you are important, you are necessary.  Please don't hesitate to reach out to an animal -- or child -- or person -- who needs you. 

I Am Not Far Away At All

You think that I am far from you? 

I feel your thoughts, I know your heart.

I am not far away at all. I'm closer than you would believe! 

You think if you stop grieving that you will somehow lose me. 

You're afraid that if you love again, 

That you will grow away from me. 

Well you're not going anywhere! 

Your soul has grown right into mine

Spun together; 

A tapestry 

Of our life and love.

You cannot lose what has become

A vital part of you.

Someday you'll see that I was with you all along the way. 

You'll then regret the time you spent

Wasting many thoughtful tears

And grieving for so many years!

But while you cannot see that now,

You'll find out what you think you lost 

You never lost at all.

I am merely gone from view.

I am here; 

I am here beside you.

Waiting for the Chosen Time

When you will see and touch and feel me 

As I run into your arms again. 

~Jack~

Separation Anxiety Reversed

Now you know the way I felt when I couldn't go with you.
You always came right home to me. 
Whey would it be any different now? 
Everything will be okay. I'll see you soon. I promise.

I'm just gone from your sight for a little while. 

I promise, you'll Come Home to me.

Have faith in this. Just wait and see. 

I'll be all excited at the gate

To see you, oh I cannot wait! 

Until then know I love you. 

I love you. I love you. I love you.