SAMPLE CHAPTER...
from
Only Gone From Your Sight:
Jack McAfghan's Little Guide to Pet Loss & Grief
by Kate McGahan
CHAPTER 4
It was
hard for friends to know how to comfort her. After all, I had been like her
child, her boyfriend, her husband and her best friend all wrapped up in one
furry package. Pets can become like family members especially for those who do
not have a family of their own.
You might find it difficult to open up
your heart and talk with most people because you fear they might think you
crazy for loving me more than you’ve loved any human. All too many who deeply
grieve the loss of a pet have been ‘reassured’ by a statement from a
well-meaning friend, “It’s just a dog/ cat/ horse/ hamster/ rabbit/ parakeet...
You can get another one.” Forgive them for they know not what they do or what
they say.
Even
other animal owners might not understand. Some people who own pets are only
master, not friend, and they miss out on the best parts of the human-animal
bond. If only they could see that we are there to teach them and to give them
the love that has otherwise been missing in their lives. The love most humans
do not know how to give…or receive. These are the people who might laugh or
sneer at you now when you call me your soulmate because they never have heard
of such a thing. They think that all soulmates are romantic relationships
between two people, not loving relationships between two beings, two friends,
two soul travelers such as us. Pity them for what they do not know. Pity them
that they cannot treat anyone else better than they treat themselves. Pity them
for the love they’ve never had or recognized.
Love
is chemistry beyond our control. When true love comes into your life it can
transform you in the most extraordinary ways and change everything you ever
believed in. You are never sure where true love is going to come from and it
can be quite a surprise when it comes from your pet.
While
it may sound strange that someone can grieve more deeply for a pet than for a
human, there is a certain undeniable depth that comes from sharing a life of
unconditional love. It doesn’t matter how many legs I have or how many you have,
it’s a soul connection. No matter how we found each other, no matter how long
we have been together, it is a relationship like no other. I have given you the
kind of love that takes humans a lifetime to learn, if they ever learn. I know
the power of love and I want to give it to you. It is the most powerful force
in the universe. I came into this world to give true love to you and to draw
true love out of you. How many people in your life do that?
Of
course people do the best they can, giving and receiving their imperfect human
love. There are a few special people on earth who are very old souls and they
are capable of loving at a very deep level. They give the highest form of love;
love that is divinely pure, honest and unconditional. It holds the loved one
more precious than oneself. It sacrifices without complaint, without
resentment, without keeping score. It gives and gives and expects nothing in
return. It’s the same kind of love that I have given to you. I came into the
world to love and be loved and I chose you. Love is why I came here. You are
the reason I came. My love has become a part of you but you don’t seem to
understand that yet. When I am gone you don’t seem to know who you are without
me. You don’t know your identity without me. I will teach you. I will teach you
through life and I will teach you through death. I will teach you that love
never dies.
When you love from the
depths of the soul in your heart, you are never apart from the one you love no
matter how far away you seem to be. Even when I am gone from your sight, I am
never gone from your heart. We live in the heart of one another for eternity,
beyond the reaches of this world. The love runs deep. That's why it hurts so
much for so long when we have to say “goodbye”. That’s also why you will get
through this. Our love runs so deep that nothing can touch it, no, not even
death. Our love will win. It always does when it is true.
I tried to comfort her. I spoke in a voice she could not hear. her grief and sadness drowned me out. I wanted to tell her what I have always known. That life is but a dream leading to love. Love, more powerful than her fear could ever be. Love cannot be destroyed. It grows and grows until it is stronger than death.
Soulmates
change all the rules in the game of life. We have been brought together, you
and me, by a common destiny. We have known each other before and we will know
each other again. I will continue to transform you from beyond the grave and
help you to see that love is more valuable and powerful than anything else.
There
will be others who will not understand this kind of love. They will raise their
eyebrows as they stand in judgment of you and comment how silly it is that you
loved me this much. Don’t worry about them. I feel sorry for them. They
obviously have never encountered a soulmate of their own or they would know
better. They would know that traditional rules do not apply when a match is
made in Heaven. Once you know this kind of love you will never question love
again. You’ll know it when you see it. You’ll know it when you feel it. You
will never be confused by something that is something else.
EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY BECAUSE
OUR LOVE WILL SEE US THROUGH.
LOVE NEVER DIES.
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