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We've Only Just Begun
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Do Not Read This if You Aren't Serious About Healing

This post contains the key to all healing. Are you ready to accept it? Can you bear to read the truth when it is looking right at you? Perhaps you can. Perhaps you can't. Perhaps you will close this up with a grumpy "Huff!" and continue to do things the way you've always done them. What you do with this post is totally up to you.  If you are grieving you will understand a lot of it. If you have faith in something greater than you, will understand all of it. 

Over and over again I hear about it. The guilt. The shame. The feeling like you didn't do enough. Or maybe you even think you did too much!

Over and over I hear how you thought I was the only one. I was the only one who would comfort you and listen to you and watch you and stay with you and not judge you. You thought I was the only one who really truly unconditionally loved you. You didn't think anyone else could accept, and perhaps even love, your quirks the way I did. And now you feel you are alone with no one. Now that I am gone, you feel there is no one who loves you more than anything else on earth. No one who can watch you without judging you. No one who can listen to you without interrupting you.  No one who is there for you to comfort you and stay with you.

When you receive your first pet, no matter how old you are, you are being entrusted with a gift from God.  He is the one who arranges the gifts of life and love and He arranges this opportunity for you to live and learn to love and be loved. He sends you the greatest gift he has to give; the love of another being who loves you more than anything else in the world. This is the closest He will ever get to being in the physical realm with you.

When it's time for that pet to leave, it usually doesn't take too long to get another because when you learn to live with that kind of love, you come to believe that you cannot live without it. So you often dive in and get another pet and once more you learn to love and be loved unconditionally...in a different package with different lessons this time. But the bottom line is that the ultimate lesson is love. Life is the school, love is the lesson. The bottom line is always love.

When you find yourselves alone after your pet has gone you often are surrounded by people who don't understand what you have lost. There are many people who have not experienced love like this with a pet, or with anyone else, for that matter. These people are not capable of understanding. Sometimes they are even afraid of it! Meanwhile you are devastated. You have had love. You have loved beyond love. Now you are alone and you think the light of love is gone from your life because your beloved pet has crossed the Rainbow Bridge. You are desperate for comfort. You long for that love.

Love is not gone at all.  The love you gave and received remains inside your heart for all time.  You know the love you felt for your best friend? Feel it now. Can you feel it?  You are probably crying now because your friend is gone and you think your love is gone too.  How can your love be gone?  It is YOUR LOVE you feel!  YOURS!  You can never lose that. EVER. It's yours.  What you are missing is the love you received in return.

No doubt you remember quite clearly the love your best friend gave to you.  Feel it now.  Can you feel their love?  Once again you are crying because your friend is gone from your sight and you think they took the love with them when they left.  They did not take the love with them. Their love remains inside your heart.

You've heard this all before no doubt.  But have you thought about this?  Do you believe in God?  Do you have faith in a higher power?  A universal life force?  God is the absolute force of love.  God is behind everything.  God sent you a pet to teach you how to love and be loved.  That pet was God Manifest in your life. God lives and breathes through everyone who loves you and through even those who don't love you because even they can teach you what love is and what love isn't.

You think when you lost your pet, you lost the love? You did not lose the love.  God gave you your pet to know what love is so that you would again seek love when love seemed to go away.  He is happy when you seek another loving pet to love.  He is particularly interested however, in the times when you have no pet at all, when you feel lost and lonely; abandoned and alone.  It is these times that are designed to remind you that He is there. He is there when no one else is there; when no one else understands. God is there in the lost and lonely moments and He offers you everything and more.

It saddens your pets and it saddens Him when you cry and wail and dwell on your loss and feel unloved because in reality YOU ARE NOT ALONE AT ALL.  He takes you to the bottom so that you are forced to look up. He allows you to drag yourself through the shadows of your tears so that you get so tired of crying that you will try to find the light again. It's totally up to you how long you stay in the shadows avoiding the light that is meant to be yours.

LOVE IS HERE. LOVE IS YOURS. God's unconditional love surrounded you before you ever came to this place and it will surround you when you leave and return to Him.  God's love is with you every step of the way and He designs your life so that you are reminded of this each and every day.  But some of you don't even think about Him. You don't remember Him. Some of you don't even believe in Him. You don't thank Him for anything. You gripe and grumble and cry and complain about what you have lost rather than looking at what you've been given. While you are seeking love when your best friend leaves you, He is waiting for you to seek Him and His love.

Try to get your Heart and your Head on the same page and everything will be Okay.  
Please think about this as you move forward. Listen to how you talk about your pet. Everything you are saying and feeling is what God wants you to be saying about and feeling for Him. The God-Dog reversal is no mistake.  It is all God's Grand Design to teach you how to love. He brings the gift of love into your life so that you will want to seek it again. You are not alone. You are never forsaken. You are loved unconditionally and without judgment.  He wants to give you everything! All He asks is for you to believe in Him, to notice Him, to make Him important to you too. Bring Him into your world and let Him love you and it will make no matter what happens on this earth... you will know you are loved and this knowledge will bring you the strength and faith to get you through anything and everything.

Love is the most powerful force in the Universe and God is love. When you feel love, you are feeling God. When you see the love pour out of the eyes of a person or pet that you love, that is God's love pouring forth.  He comes to you in your pet so that you will know how much HE loves you. HE.  He is the ultimate Lover!  He loves you. He wants you to notice him. He wants to rescue you. He wants you to adopt Him into your life. He wants your attention, your love, your care, your loyalty, your compassion. He will heal your heart and He will continue to bring you what you need if you can only keep your heart in the right place with faith that everything will be OK. Like a pet, He only wants your love.

This post is a response to those who grieve who keep dwelling and dwelling and dwelling on their "guilt" and their "shame".  Some of it comes from past life experiences that victimized them (then) and makes them believe that they are not worthy (now). If you learn what life is supposed to teach you, sometimes you find out that you not only learn, but you learn that you need to UNLEARN some of the things you learned the hard way. 

I have said it before and I will say again. I will keep saying it and saying and saying it until maybe you will believe it:


Unknown said...

Beautifully said!

Kate McGahan said...

Thank you for visiting Elizabeth... and thanks for your gracious comment <3

Unknown said...

I just love the way your heart speaks Kate. You have helped me heal slowly in so many ways. I cherish my "chunky" bracelet not just because it reminds me that my beloved boy is close by but also because of the beautiful hands that made it. Thank you for all that you do for so many.

Kate McGahan said...

Dear Jaimie - It is my privilege and pleasure to bring Jack's (and Chunky's now) wisdom to you. You must have felt the love and energy I put into that bracelet for you. Thank you for your kind words. Continued healing and much love to you.

Michele Freeman said...

Absolutely beautiful and true. We all feel it. We all go through it. It is just understanding it that truly sets us free! Live and love again. It is what God and our beloved pets that we have lost want for us. God Bless us all for believing in the higher power that lies in Gods hands. Take his hand and he will lead you. Take his love and love will find you. Believe and live again!

Michele Freeman said...

Beautiful and true. God is love and God gives love. You have to believe in order to truly understand his wonderful work. It is hard for anyone who has loved and lost but take Gods hand and he will lead you. Take Gods love and he will give you love. Believe and you will heal. God Bless all of us here and may we all find peace through God!

Kate McGahan said...

The GOD-DOG Reversal is no mistake <3 Blessed are you if you have faith.

Marsha Stern said...

I needed this, especially as I get closer to the one year anniversary. Thanks.

Unknown said...

This was so beautiful, thank you Kate. I truly felt God's love reading this. I felt warm and loved by God's love, like a blanket all around me. I was without a dog for a month after Charlie crossed the Bridge. I couldn't stand it. One year ago on Mother's Day I got my new baby from a foster mother in Atlanta (Angels Rescue). I changed his name to Samuel which means gift from God, which I truly feel he is. Its a different type of love than I had for Charlie but nevertheless its love. Charlie taught me what love means.

Thank you Kate, God led me to you and Jack.

Lisa B 💗 Lilly said...

Dear Jack❤ This is your most perfect message, alongside steering us to the vision of Heaven. I always hear you at the time I need to listen to you.

Even though it is close to three years without the physical presence of my sweet and dearest heart friend, I still collect my thoughts together when I have a blue period missing Lilly❤

But, all I have to do, as Jack instilled in me, is to just Love and share that love over and over again.

I am waiting for a new gift of Dog from God, when my life can support another friend, but, until that time, I will remember every thing you said here. Your words here could've been my words..that's how exact they expressed themselves to my heart❤

Your most faithful friend❤ Lisa B.

I thanked God every time I looked into my friend's eyes. Her eyes reflected God and His Heaven back to me. He says that "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life."��

colleeng317 said...

Beautiful as always Jack. I love you with all my heart. Is it a coincidence that my firstborn, the one who taught me selfless sacrifice, is named Jack? I think not. And I have been rewarded; by knowing you, by knowing Kate, by having my two beautiful sons reunited and traveling with their father. Life is Love. Love is all there is. I love you so much my beautiful Jack.

Jill Hefflefinger said...

Thank you for sharing this with me, Kate! It means so much. Sometimes it seems hard to remember all of these things when we are lost in the deepest parts of our grief. I will keep retreading this from time to time to help me heal. I appreciate all your help! ��

Jack McAfghan said...

Thank you Jill. Sorry just seeing your message now. Hope all is well and thank you for being so receptive to our message! Hope you are healing bit by bit... Love Jack

Anonymous said...

Beautifully said

Vicki Sattler said...

Beautifully written, Kate ! Exactly what I needed today (Pearls 16th birthday today)