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| This is Inook |
The Jack McAfghan Series
More to Come!
Wednesday
Tuesday
The Most Important Lesson
Dogs are sent here to help humans learn to love and be loved.
Sometimes we pay the price of being vulnerable
but most of the time we get as much love back as we give.
Sometimes more.
heart emotic
Friday
The Initial Disappointment
It was the perfect arrangement. Kate had driven the 20 hours to meet Immy. She extended her stay in a small rustic cabin at Ma's Loma Cafe in Loma Montana. Brian Wood, Immy's owner, was willing to allow her to take Immy on a trial for the rest of the week. At the end of the week, Kate could decide whether or not she wanted to take Immy home.
Immy is lovely and sweet, but very timid. There was an episode on their first walk together. Kate still has a scar on her hand from when they were walking along the river under the underpass. It seems a car drove by overhead and at that same moment Kate's foot struck a rough spot on the path and it all startled Immy so much that Immy bolted and pulled Kate down onto the gravel path. Kate got on her knees in front of Immy to talk with her; reassure her. She reached out to pet Immy and Immy bolted again. She caught Kate totally off guard and ended up dragging Kate several feet through the gravel.
"Wow," Kate exclaimed, startled and in pain. "I'm not sure this is going to work out." I was surprised that Kate seemed to feel so defeated after this incident. It was just one incident of a dog bringing it's old fear into the new situation. I understood Immy because Kate was strange to her and she had not had a chance to build up a level of trust. On the other hand Immy was strange to Kate as well, and she had not had a chance to build up a level of trust either.
Give it time Kate. Give it time.
Immy is lovely and sweet, but very timid. There was an episode on their first walk together. Kate still has a scar on her hand from when they were walking along the river under the underpass. It seems a car drove by overhead and at that same moment Kate's foot struck a rough spot on the path and it all startled Immy so much that Immy bolted and pulled Kate down onto the gravel path. Kate got on her knees in front of Immy to talk with her; reassure her. She reached out to pet Immy and Immy bolted again. She caught Kate totally off guard and ended up dragging Kate several feet through the gravel.
"Wow," Kate exclaimed, startled and in pain. "I'm not sure this is going to work out." I was surprised that Kate seemed to feel so defeated after this incident. It was just one incident of a dog bringing it's old fear into the new situation. I understood Immy because Kate was strange to her and she had not had a chance to build up a level of trust. On the other hand Immy was strange to Kate as well, and she had not had a chance to build up a level of trust either.
Give it time Kate. Give it time.
THE NEXT CHAPTER: LIFE WITH IMMY BEGINS
We got off track with our story with the publication of my book "Jack McAfghan: Reflections on Life with my Master". The book now kind of has a life of its own. The orders are coming in and we can get back to telling our story.
Backtracking: I was assigned to be Immy's Guardian Angel and I was able to get Kate to drive to Montana to meet her. It was love at first sight. The first time she ushered Immy into the back of the car she said "C'mon Im!" like she had said it every day of her life.
That's how you know the dog is right for you. It has a strangely familiar feel. You don't always understand each other but it doesn't take as much work as it does with the others. It's kind of like people. You just know when it feels right. The old comfortable shoe. The collar that feels better on than off.
Backtracking: I was assigned to be Immy's Guardian Angel and I was able to get Kate to drive to Montana to meet her. It was love at first sight. The first time she ushered Immy into the back of the car she said "C'mon Im!" like she had said it every day of her life.
That's how you know the dog is right for you. It has a strangely familiar feel. You don't always understand each other but it doesn't take as much work as it does with the others. It's kind of like people. You just know when it feels right. The old comfortable shoe. The collar that feels better on than off.
She Made Everything Fun, Even the Stuff That was Scary
There was the time when we short sold our house and had to find a place to live. We found a nice place, but every time you move you have to adapt and sometimes you have to learn new things. She was a great teacher because even if I got nervous or scared, which wasn't very often, she was always very reassuring and she actually made the scary things seem fun. After awhile I found everything fun!
Getting used to our new place, I never saw these things before!Posted by Jack McAfghan on Sunday, September 15, 2013
Thursday
Don't Let The Memory Be Stronger Than You
by Kate McGahan
The Side Yard
Just because I wrote a book doesn't mean that I am above my own sorrow and grief. I am just like you. We are just like each other when we grieve and I know when I tell you this story that your own story will come to mind. I apologize in advance, but just bringing the story into your mind will heal you a little bit more. If you're not ready to heal, then don't read any further.
I have a little side yard which is where I always took Jack in the mornings to do his "thing." He went in for surgery (for the removal of a rectal mass) on a Tuesday and during his 'recovery' period I took him to the side yard like we always did. But it wasn't like always. He tried to poop but he couldn't. I won't go into detail, but I sat on the rocks that you see in the photo and I wept as I watched. It went on for three days.
I wouldn't go out into the yard after he passed; it bothered me too much. The memory was so strong that it took over the side yard. The memory was stronger than I was.
When I got Immy in early May, I started using the side yard again because it's really the only place we have shreds of grass around here. The first time I went out, it was really hard to be there. I couldn't stop thinking of him. I cried, I almost wept, again. The next time was a little better. Now, six weeks later, things have vastly improved. Jack is still "there" in The Yard In My Mind but every day it gets a little easier.
I have a little side yard which is where I always took Jack in the mornings to do his "thing." He went in for surgery (for the removal of a rectal mass) on a Tuesday and during his 'recovery' period I took him to the side yard like we always did. But it wasn't like always. He tried to poop but he couldn't. I won't go into detail, but I sat on the rocks that you see in the photo and I wept as I watched. It went on for three days.
I wouldn't go out into the yard after he passed; it bothered me too much. The memory was so strong that it took over the side yard. The memory was stronger than I was.
When I got Immy in early May, I started using the side yard again because it's really the only place we have shreds of grass around here. The first time I went out, it was really hard to be there. I couldn't stop thinking of him. I cried, I almost wept, again. The next time was a little better. Now, six weeks later, things have vastly improved. Jack is still "there" in The Yard In My Mind but every day it gets a little easier.
If we try to avoid the pain and the memories by avoiding a part of our life (or part of our property in this case) we will not progress. We will remain STUCK at the place where we started avoiding. We will never move beyond our grief. There was a very good book written years ago called "What You Feel You Can Heal". You cannot heal without going through the torrent of feelings that comes from facing reality and letting go of what no longer is.
I believe Jack is still beside me. I need to remove him from that memory because it does not serve him either. He is happy and healthy and strong and he is full of light and love. There's no room in him for anything else but these things.
Jack in the Side Yard One Month Before He Passed
All is well.
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