Kate and Joey and Immy were out walking today and they crossed paths with a older couple walking a corgi mix. They said Hi and the other dog's only response was to snarl and growl, lunging and straining at the leash, barking his head off at them.
"He's been like that since we rescued him six years ago," they said matter-of-factly. "There seems to be no cure. He just doesn't like anybody!" They added, "We love him anyway. We'll always love him no matter what."
Their dog does not feel guilty about his behavior. He doesn't care if he's not perfect. He is what he is. He knows that they love him, they know that he loves them to the extent he can love, and that is enough. Please don't keep revisiting your past behavior and and finding more guilt and shame there. Guilt and shame exist only in your mind. Your pets love you despite everything and, like these human owners, they don't think twice. It's just the way it is. Unconditional love wins. Let it win the battle over guilt and shame. Let it in. Let love win.